Tuesday, January 3, 2012

Fed Up

I am fed up... Literally and figuratively! I have fed myself up to the top, out to the sides, down to the toes. Stretching my skin, stretching my organs, stretching my health and stretching my patience. I'm ready to explode. I don't feel well. I don't enjoy doing things that I used to love to do. I am ready to live again. I knew I had to get to this place in order to make a change.

So, here I am. Starting a blog which I have been saying that I was going to do for a longgg time. In the past, I would get caught up in analysis paralysis. I would start researching the best way to set up my blog. I wanted it to be perfect before I ever started it. Now that I think of it, that seems to be the story of my life. I'm sure the analysis paralysis theme will come back up throughout this blog. I will just have to be mindful of getting caught in that trap. In the past, if I thought about starting a diet, I would think, "Ok, I need to get workout clothes, new shoes, healthy food, vitamins, etc." That's all well and good, but I wouldn't get started until I had everything sorted out. And guess what?!?! You got it, I'd never get started! I am praying this time will be different. And it already is. A few minutes ago when I thought that I should start a blog to document my weight loss, I googled starting a blog and starting it within 60 seconds! Yay me! Good start!

My plan is this... Start eating healthy, exercising and blogging my progress with pics. Yes, I just said with pics! There is a war going on in my head right now! I really want to let it all hang out. Well, I don't really want to let it all hang out! I don't want to take pics in shorts and an athletic top showing my mid-drift. But if I take pics in baggy clothes, I am kind of defeating the purpose. I'll have to figure this out. I don't want to die of humiliation. Right now, I am imagining someone eating a bowl of cereal while reading my blog and throwing up in the bowl when they see the first pic! Lord, help me! I think I'm breaking out in hives!

I want to be real in this blog. It's mortifying to think of posting my stats. It would be one thing if I had lost 60 lbs and could say what I "used" to weigh. But I can't.

So I will work on taking that first pic and typing the fat stats.

I can't seem to click "Publish Post". Feeling like I am going to be sick. Here goes nothing....

4 comments:

  1. Good start! You are already doing great!

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  2. Steph,
    I'm so proud of you! You are such a talented writer and you are going have great progress!!

    Happy 2012!

    All the best,
    Yvonne

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  3. Way to go, Steph. I look forward to reading your posts and seeing your progress!

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